If 2020 taught me anything, it taught me about myself. It taught me that I am happiest when I live my life in the moment. And I never used to be this way.
I was the one who sat down for dinner with my husband and before the menus arrived, asked him where we were headed next.
I needed to know what was after the pile of nachos instead of enjoying the meaty, sour cream and cheesy, salsa-drenched tortilla chips.
Maxed Out on D&A
I’ve heard that depression is living in the past and anxiety is living in the future. I can deeply relate with that statement. I overdosed on depression and anxiety many years ago.
A little too much D & A, one might say.
In my twenties I was all about acquiring stuff, so naturally I found it necessary to accumulate as much D & A as womanly possible.
Anyway, I maxed out, I got help and do not plan on accruing anymore D & A rubbish in my future. But that statement reminds me that to keep the D & A at bay, I need to focus on what is in front of me – not on what is behind me or too far in front of me. Focus on the right now.
Before I forget…When you go to Nashville, go to a worship service. Faith-based music in Music City won’t disappoint. We loved The Belonging Company!
We heard this message at the Belonging Co. about God’s Perfect Gift, AND IT IS EVERYTHING!
Girls Gone Wild
I’m living a bit of a “Wild” experience (you know, the movie or book) in this RV life. I’ve learned to be comfortable being uncomfortable. I thrive in new, uneasy situations.
This ability, I attribute to learning to live for the moment. This type of living brings me true, lasting peace. It’s the grassroots of my desires, God’s perfect peace. Everything else is just added bliss.
That’s a pretty picture and all, but I’ve glossed over the details, it took a lot of work over many years to get where I am today.
Sometimes the Big Picture is Just Too Damn Big
When I talk about living moment to moment, that doesn’t mean that I don’t have long term dreams and plans I follow to get me there.
But as long as I trust myself to do what I need to do when the time comes to do it – I have the peace to simply focus on today.
I give myself a set amount of time to concentrate on the big picture, plan what needs to be planned, schedule what needs to be scheduled and then I put the big picture away, I don’t worry about.
I just do today and I friggin’ love today.
Here’s a big picture of my mom smacking her adult-lady-ass at the Opry.
Wild – 2014 movie with Reese Witherspoon
Here I Am and Here Are You
So today. It is New Years Eve. Zach is at the gym. I rolled my ankle on our run today. I thought that made it the perfect time to ice my foot and write a blog post. Here I am, writing to you. Here you are reading strings of words put together by my brain. We are two lucky souls.
(Sorry, I blacked out thinking about if it is sols, souls or soles and got trapped in a homophone funnel.)
So much has happened in the past month. Our time in Nashville flew by lightning fast, it feels like we only had a few weeks in Music City.
In an unexpected happenstance, I am actually considering Nashville (or a suburb of Nashville) as a potential home base. It has become Number 2 on Jena’s list of 2 places she wants to buy land.
Our highlights from Nashville
Running with the Dirtbags – a trail running group. This was a 5.5 mile trail run in the dark. We also ran a half marathon on this trail.
Live Music – 3rd and Lindsley, The Listening Room, Grand Ole Opry, Station Inn
A trip to Pigeon Forge, Dollywood, Gatlinburg and Smokey Mountain National Park with my mom.
We are now in Magnolia Springs, Alabama. We love it here so much we will be here for two months.
What does 2021 look like for the Smiths?
Who freaking knows. We don’t! We began our full time RV life living day by day, but living through a pandemic – without a home – really gave us a day by day overhaul. Like you, we had little ability to make plans this year.
We have transitioned to a new plane (is it plane or plain or peelane?) of thinking. This new plane is one that has no answers. We are okay not knowing what is next. We are okay with taking our time and enjoying the journey as it is presented to us.
We have dreams and a picture in our head of where God is leading us, but we are okay not knowing exactly what that plan is. The most common question we get is, where will you “end up”? Frankly, to me, I don’t really want to “end up” anywhere. “Ending up”…isn’t that the end? My journey is far from the end.
I want to experience it all and live it boldly (with a facemask dangling off my ear)! While I live I want to move and grow and explore and adapt and progress until I officially “end up”. And if that day comes sooner than expected, you can all have peace – because she lived hard and she prayed even harder.
Don’t be surprised if we don’t truly settle down anytime soon. We may likely secure a home base, but we will continue to be on the move. I’m sure my feelings will change as life changes and my body slows and my brain forgets how to use all the homophones, but I’m not ready to “end up” anywhere. That shit aint on my bucket list. (I read a meme that said the smarter you are the more you cuss. So I’m trying out new words like “shit” and “damn”. Hope that’s okay with you.)
I’ve got places to explore and gymnasts to train (our God daughter is poised to be an Olympic gymnast at the 2032 summer games), so I’ll be hopping around this land for years to come.
Happy New Year, you filthy animals.
Oops Zach just walked in, I guess the gym closed early due to the Holiday. And hey, he brought steaks! I guess I’ll keep him.